Domino effect

Port Melbourne's post office moved from the building opposite the Exchange Hotel around 1910, just in time for the beginning of the reign of King George, as signified upon its Palladian gabled front. I wouldn't have thought there was much sadder fate for such significant heritage building, than to be lying forlornly empty for years. That is until I saw the eventual replacement for Bay Street's sorely missed Readings bookstore.

For a supposedly health-obsessed suburb, Port Melbourne already has a plentiful supply of pizza vendors, so the garish arrival of the world's biggest pizza chain is ... a disappointment. It's a great pity that the inventive pattern of reuse set by Corte couldn't have been followed here. I had my hopes set on some Latin spark establishing Port Melbourne's first taqueria. Instead we just have mopeds cluttering the pavement and a yawn-worthy menu of cheese overload.

State route 30

It is now possible, thanks to Google's recent addition of historical imagery to their Street View, to step back in time and see how Bay Street (aka State Route 30) has evolved since 2007. Though not as dramatic as this scene from WA, the change in sky-line resulting from the Bianca complex is pretty stark.

The time lapse shows the gradual replacement of cafes like Bay Treat Cafe, the Fergusson Plarre Bakehouse and Tallship Cafe with today's coffee heavyweights. It also a reminder of some of the chains that decided to move on from this suburb; like Pepe Jeans, Readings and Urban Burger. But it's the colourfully named independent stores like Fat Zap, Shoe Fetish, Boils and Kinki Koko I think I miss the most.

Landmarks in line

Grand Prix Sunday was controversially peaceful this year, with the hornet's nest of screaming combustion engines that normally erupts just after the Qantas fly-over, conspicuously out of earshot. Of course the hybrid revolution, and subsequent downsizing of Formula 1 engines hasn't yet filtered down to the V8 muscle cars that have been letting rip first thing each morning.

There was a new landmark for the jumbo jet pilot this year too, with one of the two Stothert & Pitt cranes that used to operate on Station Pier restored and relocated near to its original spot. Lined up with the outer beacon and starch factory chimney they make for a bold impression of Port's maritime and industrial heritage.

Then and now

The National Library of Australia's Trove facility is a great resource for anyone fancying a little casual research for history week. For example a quick search reveals an interesting pair of images, showing a wide and empty Bay Street, that are freely reproducible.

This one, looking toward what is now Coles, shows the old Port Melbourne Theatre (not to be confused with the Hoyts Eclipse Theatre where 7-Eleven now stands) on the left, whose structure now houses both the Telstra store and Simple Affair...

The theatre was built on the site of the Fire Brigade Hotel (so named presumably as a result of the Fire Station opposite it on Liardet Street), which in turn originally started off life as the Foundry Hotel. The proximity of the fire station came in handy when fire erupted there in 1924. It eventually closed its doors in 1952 and was converted into a battery factory.

Railway Hotel

Not to be mistaken for Port Melbourne's Railway Club Hotel, the Railway Hotel is one of a string of really rather good pubs on the Southern side of Ferrars Street. Its impressive beer selection is on a par with the nearby Palace, Wayside or O'Connell's hotels, yet this 1850's inn real ace is a unique charm that can't be bought in.

For starters it's a bit of labyrinth, with front and back bars, open fire, pool table and pinball, non-invasive dining area and function room, and a surprising beer garden tucked behind the neighbouring house. The décor, around the long snaking bar, is fabulously old school with a mixture of art deco features, pressed metal and linoleum all old enough to have become cool again. Out front a sign proudly proclaims it a pokie-free zone.

Renamed after Melbourne's second train line (now the 96 tram route) opposite, the pub originally licensed as The Napoleon Third, manages to be both a good honest boozer and an appealing place for the residents of the affluent Albert Park and South Melbourne streets nearby.

Happy butt sniffing

The Palace Hotel, just one block from the North Eastern boundary between South and Port Melbourne, has been through more than its fair share of incarnations its 139 year history. In recent years of course it's gone from (Luke Mangan's) Palace Hotel, briefly to SoHo and back, but it was originally built as Meagher's Hotel and has also been known as the Partner’s Tavern and, my personal favourite, the Pickled Pig Hotel.

Given its recent history, as a restaurant in pub clothing, it seems quite audacious for Jess, Pratty and Dan, the latest operators, to reverse the general trend and attempt to fashion an old-school local pub from the space. It's a certainly a transformation seeing beer trays, a pool table and particularly a Staffordshire Bull Terrier, where there used to be crisp white table clothes. They're justifiably proud to be free of TAB and loud music, and of the rarest of pub assets ... a leafy (and now mutt welcoming) garden.

The beer loving inhabitants of Port Melbourne can save their legs, as the range and enthusiasm for craft beers here is at least as great as at the nearby Wayside Inn and O'Connells. The only downside that I can see is that the huddle of stools round the bar, favoured by regulars, creates a bit of a barrier to ordering that passing trade may find off putting.

Beers on tap: Carlton, Trumer Pils, Stone & Wood Pacific Ale, 3 Ravens Pale Ale, Bridge Port IPA, Mountain Goat IPA, Hargreaves Hill ESB, Moo Brew Dark Ale
Wine range: $9.50 - $11
Parma: Yes ($12 on Mondays)
Gastro: No and proud of it
Tradie vs Yuppy: Deliberately an all-comers kind of place

Siege history

A cursory Google search reveals that this evening's drama on "trendy" Bay Street was not the first time that the town has involuntarily hosted an armed siege. Four years ago, Williamstown Road was blocked off whilst Police negotiated with a similarly disturbed knifeman, and ten years ago a gunman brought chaos to the Westgate Bridge.

But the most dramatic story comes from February 1975, during the week before colour television was first broadcast, when a young woman fired more than 100 shots from the top of a fuel storage container, in what is now Beacon Cove.

TAOB

For a while the replacement for Belle Zain, the bay-facing restaurant sited at what was the end of the old lagoon, looked set to be named The Lonsdale; in recognition of the twin towers above it, themselves named after the HMAS Lonsdale naval base built there in 1942. Instead, the new owners have settled simply on the name Boat (apparently they aren't concerned about people finding them on Google).

Boat adds some diversity to the Port Melbourne dining scene with it's Greek tilted menu. It's pitched at a similar pocket to its predecessor, which puts it in a similar price zone to the Station Pier restaurants. This is justified by the quality of food and, on a nice evening, great sunset views although the black box interior lacks atmosphere.  The service meanwhile is a step up from Belle Zain, although still not in the same league as the The Graham just two blocks in-land along the former Esplanade.

Main prices: $22 -45
Beer range: No taps, but typical bottles including a house beer
Wine range: $6-11
Quantity vs quality: Quality wins out in the end

Station traders

It may have no real laneway gems, but Port Melbourne does have a growing number of places away from the Bay Street bustle to reward the sleepy side street explorer. In addition to the quirkiness of their location, places like Little Rose, The Graham, Decanters, Priscilla Jones and the Cricketers Arms each have to try that bit harder to get people through their door.

Despite being home to many of the town's finest houses Station Street, looking out over Australia's first railway (now the 109 track), qualifies as one such sleepy side street. So it's fascinating to see the rebirth of this corner shop opposite the Railway Club as the Station Street Trading Company (it was listed for sale as a confectionary shop back in 1918). It may be a long way off Bay Street but, as in its earlier incarnations, it does have one ace up its sleeve as it's right by the North Port tram stop and apparently plans to offer tempting takeaway options for passing commuters.

Gaps in the market?

The evolution of the imposing blue stone building at the end of Bay Street from coal depot to private gymasium seems rather representative of the evolution of Port Melbourne itself. Morley's depot was built in 1872 (the same year as the Royal Mail Hotel) and named after the first Mayor of Sandridge, one William Morley. Soon however it will open as the latest of Port Melbourne's gyms, operated by South Pacific Health Clubs (who also run the St Kilda sea baths). It joins Genesis Fitness, KX Pilates, Bodycare Pilates and a host of local personal trainers feeding the town's obsession with healthy and beauty.

Heading out to the shops on a weekday evening, it's easy to feel out of place not wearing compression leggings. It makes me think that someone's missing an opportunity to open a Lorna Jane or 2XU stockist here. And yet it does sit oddly with Bay Street's, and now Beach Street's, other obsession ... with pizza (although kudos to Crust Pizza for declaring the calorific content of their menu). Given the combination of disposable income and health interest, there's surely room for some more healthy eating-out options. The only one that really comes to mind is the legendary Hunky Dory, who surely sell much more rice than chips with their (mostly) grilled fish and, let's face it, do incredibly well for themselves as a result.

Borderline

The Floodgate hotel used to mark the Northernmost tip of Sandridge Lagoon; the large saltwater lagoon onto which Esplanade East and West used to face. It was somewhat daringly built four years after the great flood of 1863 in a spot almost guaranteed to live up to its name.

Now, however, the pretty pub on the corner of Ingles Street is home to Madonna's; one of Port Melbourne's many many pizza joints (they do do pasta, risotto and a few other mains too mind).

It's an unpretentious restaurant that manages to balance a smart contemporary atmosphere with a family-friendly menu. The pizzas are topping heavy (which I guess is one of those love/hate things) aboard a relatively thin traditional base, and good value too at around $13 for a dinner plate-sized small.

A sense of place

There's a bit of a surprise lurking at the bottom of the council's local area map, in the form of a link to a free MP3 audio walking tour of Port Melbourne. It's a well produced narrative, in the style used at many historical tourist attractions, which runs for 48 minutes. It makes for a mildly interesting way to while away an hour and you learn, if nothing else, how bad the place used to smell and how Liardet is pronounced. However there is one segment on the brownout strangler which seems out of place, since none of those crimes occured here.

The web-site mentioned during the tour is now defunct, and there no longer appears to be a tour map available for download, so above is the route followed. It's a (just under) two mile circuit starting and finishing at Station Pier, and it's not really necessary to pause at the exact points suggested, you can just continue wandering leisurely along the route. Thankfully, despite being a few years old, the sights on the tour are all still standing with the exception of the Faram Brothers hardware store.

Beautiful things

As the tabletops inside attest, the brand new Italian café Bella Cosi on Beach Street is housed in the former Freemasons Tavern, the facade of which was rebuilt in its original 1859 style as part of the apartment block that now pokes out the of the top. This reproduction advertisement on the Stokes Street side, echoes the alcoholic history on the side of the former Joshua Brothers distillery on Pickles Street.

As far as I know, this commercial property (next door to the relatively new Nami Japanese restaurant) has been empty since the 2008 rebuild. It's a wonder to me (especially with The London currently lying dormant) that there aren't more businesses taking advantage of the views down on the front here. They are currently open late Wed-Fri, although currently unlicensed. As well as the pastries, espresso and biscotti that you would expect, the Di Lisio family is also planning on offering coffee machines, cookery classes and gift hampers. Good luck to them :-)

Meeting farmer Giles

How great is the farmer's market? Judging by the number of folk walking around with bunches of organic rhubarb, there can't be many Port Melbourne folk who aren't aware of this monthly wonder. Talking to the stall holders, it seems this is the biggest and busiest market on their circuit.

In case there is anyone who has somehow missed it since it started five years ago, the market is held on the third Saturday morning of each month. The quality of fresh produce is way above what you'll find in Coles and typically cheaper too. It's not all healthy produce either, there's cakes and beer to keep the rest of us happy, just remember to bring your own bags. You can even combine it with brunch at the Gas Works cafe (which currently has an interesting set of photos showing the history of this part of town, including the great explosion of 1920).

The Local

The Local, next to Circus Oz, serves as a useful counterpoint to the glitz of The Pier and Exchange pubs on neighbouring corners of Bay Street. Previously one of those awful Elephant & Wheelbarrow chain-pubs it retains the same, dog-eared, quasi-English style interior and as a result appeals no doubt to the town's numerous ex-pats.

This is a no nonsense boozer with a large array of beers, mostly from afar. You wouldn't necessarily take someone there to impress them ... unless they had a peculiar fondness for nanna carpet that is. Mind you there's a bar upstairs, complete with small balcony overlooking some of the town's more questionable architecture over the road, and this was one of only a handful of pubs in Melbourne to secure a license for showing the World Cup soccer earlier in the year.

Despite the box-like industrial exterior, The Local was originally built in 1872 as the Royal Mail Hotel, being the other side of the former mail exchange from the Exchange Hotel. As far back as 1888, it was one of 23 hotels proposed to be shut-down during the temperance movement; it is one of three of those establishments to have survived to this day.

Beers on tap: Cartlton Draught, Classic Blonde, Boag's, XXXX Gold, Kosciuszko Pale Ale, Heineken, Grolsch, Peroni, James Squire Golden & Amber Ales, Kirin, Guinness, Kilkenny.
Wine range: $7 - $9.50 a glass
Parma: $22 (see my review)
Gastro: No
Tradie vs Yuppy: Neither, just down to earth

The Graham

What actually is the difference between a bar and a wine bar? The small drinking den tacked on the side of The Graham describes itself as the latter, yet has a by-the-glass wine list not dramatically larger than many a food-oriented pub. I suspect that it's more about who the owners are trying to attract. With the majority of the establishment taken over by a well-rated high class restaurant, it figures that they're not really interested in the beer-swilling, sport-watching hordes (although their range of bottled beers is actually very respectable).

Despite the pretensions of grandeur, this cosy bar with courtyard is actually a pleasant place to have a drink (if you can face the prices), and the tapas is of predictably high quality. It helps that it's location is tucked away, and therefore not mobbed to the same degree as your typical Bay Street bar. The bar staff provide table service when they're not busy.

Built around 1870, the Graham (Family) Hotel has not always been a spotless white-linen dining establishment. The newspaper archives show that in times gone by landlords were repeatedly suspected of flouting their license, and there was an even a case of a supposed suicide by poisoning.

Beers on tap: Peroni
Wine range: $9-13 a glass
Parma: Not that sort of place
Gastro:Yup
Tradie vs Yuppy: Screams yuppy, but is not actually too snobby