Gluten-free organic paleo palace

It's hard to fathom, given the combination of premium pricing and willing customers how Woolies can have failed to turned a profit from their Thomas Dux store here. But with money haemorrhaging from their DIY chain, they controversially closed our store a couple of months back.

That may have made good financial sense in the short term, but in the process they've allowed Sydney based up-start About Life to slide in to the, now established, market. Initial impressions are that "Nature's Providore" are more willing to go the whole hog with the whole gourmet grocer concept and capitalise on demand, particularly amongst high disposable incomer earners, for organic and holistic products. And they've somehow managed to find space too for a café and array of bain-maries offering tempting looking ready-cooked dishes, and salads to rival the Foxes Den across the road.

Rude awakening

For many it really was a rude awakening on Bay Street this morning, as twenty MFB units battled the blaze at the former Port Melbourne Theatre, closing off a slew of neighbouring streets in the process. Fortunately no-one seems to have been seriously hurt.

I'd already drafted a post about Brew'd Awakenings, the punny Manhattan themed replacement of the Simple Affair café and alternative therapy centre. It had maintained the same cavernous open-brick interior, although with the counter moved to an island in the centre, bizarrely concealing the best tables behind it.

It would be unseemly now to mention how I rated their coffee and food. The one ominous observation that does linger though is how much chunky timber, much of it with their blackened logo burnt on to it, there was. I just hope that the distinctive structure of this heritage building can be saved.

Beluga

It's a brave person that attempts to bring a grilled fish & posh salad business model to the original home of Hunky Dory. Evidently Belvga with a 'U', who already operate a store in South Yarra, hopes to entice some hunky (and Old Salt) custom their way.

Although their shop frontage, in the base of the 101 complex, is wider than HD's, their outdoor table space is no bigger and, crucially at this time of year, doesn't boast outdoor heating. However for traditional sea-side fish & chips lovers they do benefit from being that much closer to the beach.

For the moment at least, the ambience in the spacious interior is quiet, which should tempt those nearby apartment dwellers that are happy to avoid frenetic queues. And when they do they'll find that the quality and freshness is very similar to the more famous counterpart.

Beyond belief

I was bemused when the café at the base of the HM@S apartments, whose penthouse is currently asking a price beyond belief, was renamed from Bellezain to simply Boat. But that was considerably more creative than the frankly dismal name chosen for the latest incarnation of what was, until recently, the charming Harold Holt espresso lounge.

Staking a, not very, bold claim to be "Beyond Basic", the self declared speciality (or specialty if you prefer) for this beach-facing café is their coffee; which is a considerable disservice to the, clearly accomplished and ambitious, chef. With a wide selection of beans, some heavyweight brewing equipment and an enthusiastic barista, the coffee's certainly not basic, but how does it compare to the best of Bay Street?

State route 30

It is now possible, thanks to Google's recent addition of historical imagery to their Street View, to step back in time and see how Bay Street (aka State Route 30) has evolved since 2007. Though not as dramatic as this scene from WA, the change in sky-line resulting from the Bianca complex is pretty stark.

The time lapse shows the gradual replacement of cafes like Bay Treat Cafe, the Fergusson Plarre Bakehouse and Tallship Cafe with today's coffee heavyweights. It also a reminder of some of the chains that decided to move on from this suburb; like Pepe Jeans, Readings and Urban Burger. But it's the colourfully named independent stores like Fat Zap, Shoe Fetish, Boils and Kinki Koko I think I miss the most.

Harry Truman

The intersection of Kerferd Road and Montague Street might not sound like the most peaceful spot to sip on a soy latte, yet by the weekend the triangle outside Albert Park's presidential answer to the Harold Holt cafe is surprisingly calm. Inside Truman is a different matter though, with a veritable army of hipster wait staff carrying intriguing plates, under the watchful eye of an even bigger army of plastic soldiers marching across the ceiling.

The World War reference makes more sense than the pineapple kitsch or teaspoon collection, though the odd assortment of curios makes for a pleasant ambience for the new owners of The Block apartments around the corner, as they wait for their order. Which is handy because the wait can be noticeable, with what feels like all food being cooked by a single stressed chef.

However it is worth the wait. This halloumi breakie squeezes an autumnal pumpkin and leek smash between poached eggs and multi-grain sourdough, and then adds kale pesto, sesame seeds and pumpkin seeds on top for added textural and taste interest. These are just the sort of imaginative dishes that give you a warm feeling about living in these parts, and deciding to venture out for brunch.

Cheviot Beach

It's surprisingly tough making a crust out on the sea front. The London has only just started pouring pints again, whilst the Paris Grill has given up the ghost. However the Harold Holt Espresso Lounge, the latest incarnation of the restaurant space at the base of HM@S Lonsdale, may just have the goods to weather the sometimes harsh bay winds.

Clearly pitching himself in the same urban hip zone as the likes of the Salford Lads Club, Harold's bare plywood tables and black & white photography are a more natural fit for the polished concrete space than previous occupants. It may be the mood of the nation (although still not this electorate), but it still seems a little unexpected for such a café to be named after a Liberal politician, even a particularly charismatic and ultimately mysterious one.

The quality of the coffee (definitely top 5 in my opinion) and intriguing food here should provide a sufficient draw for the Bay Street brunch bunch to venture out on to the front, and come summer the view will as always be hard to beat. The bigger unknown however is how they'll fare with evening diners, currently being courted with share plates Thursday to Sunday.

$29.99 or less

Now sporting the catchy title "Good Food Under Thirty Dollars (for two courses)", The Age's annual bible of cheap eats has down-sized but still remains a reliable guide of where to find high quality cooking for reasonable prices. In the absence of a handy Readings store (surely it's only a matter of time before someone decides to open another pizza restaurant there?) to peruse the $10 booklet, below are the local entries.

Compared to last year, Port's humble contribution to the 500+ entries has declined from 8 to 6. At first glance this is merely due to the removal of the 'Neighbourhood Lowdown' feature (and hence mention of Noisette and Café Di Lido), however over the same period neighbouring South Melbourne's entries have risen from 13 to 20...

Of the remaining local entries only one, the stalwart Hunky Dory, opens after dark. Consequently there is a close alignment with the town's premier coffee merchants. Flying the banner this year are the usual suspects of Balderdash, Salford Lads Club, My Sister Says and Third Wave. However somewhat controversially Little Rose has usurped Seven:AM, and one can only assume that the new kids on Station Street began their trading a little too late to be reviewed.

Ravi Shankar

The doodled walls and red signage of Sri Sri, the latest addition to the quick feed stretch of Bay Street, are rather reminiscent of the Grilld burger chain ... which is topical what with Urban Burger, a few doors down, in the midst of its own metamorphis. However there are no patties on the menu here, the Sri being of the Lankan form, with the tantalising promise of some more welcome spice to the Port Melbourne dining scene.

Sri Sri hopes to capitalise on its location by offering, at weekends at least, food from breakfast through to pub closing time. This seems quite bold sat as it is, two doors down from one of Port Melbourne's finest breakie spots. And the abundant Western morning options contribute to what comes across as a somewhat confusing menu, as it's tricky locating many "Real Sri Lankan Flavours" amongst all the variations of poached eggs and fish & chips.

Station traders

It may have no real laneway gems, but Port Melbourne does have a growing number of places away from the Bay Street bustle to reward the sleepy side street explorer. In addition to the quirkiness of their location, places like Little Rose, The Graham, Decanters, Priscilla Jones and the Cricketers Arms each have to try that bit harder to get people through their door.

Despite being home to many of the town's finest houses Station Street, looking out over Australia's first railway (now the 109 track), qualifies as one such sleepy side street. So it's fascinating to see the rebirth of this corner shop opposite the Railway Club as the Station Street Trading Company (it was listed for sale as a confectionary shop back in 1918). It may be a long way off Bay Street but, as in its earlier incarnations, it does have one ace up its sleeve as it's right by the North Port tram stop and apparently plans to offer tempting takeaway options for passing commuters.

Cinco sentidos

Interestingly Port Melbourne's entries in The Age's recently released Good Cafe Guide lined up almost exactly with my own preferences, and they too thought that THE best place for coffee was this one...

It's nearly two years since unassuming looking Balderdash opened its corner door and it's fair to say that it's found a lot of favour with local caffeine addicts. However it's not just the lattes that keep this place bustling, the menu's pretty special too.

Grey & Bliss

You can imagine that the return to action of Bay Street's largest cafe must've caused some reverberations amongst the local coffee wizards. For the former Tall Ship beside Coles has been reborn as Grey & Bliss.

The polished cement, bare bricks and collections of mirrors, clocks and plates are clearly more up to date than its predecessor, but the nanna's sideboard and bank of chillers containing pre-prepared salads, wraps and paninis help stop the place feeling pretentious.

The menu is reasonably adventurous and the food is served, in a cheery fashion, on large earthenware plates. The people running this place clearly know what they're doing. And the coffee? Yes, the top five may have valid cause for concern.

Coffee: $3.50 (single origin)
Juice: $7.00 (freshly squeezed)
Eggs: $8.50
Licensed: Yes

Best coffee?

Port Melbourne has come a long way in the caffeine stakes in the two years since Spencer first cast his eyes upon it. It was probably inevitable that this city's lust for top quality espresso, macchiato and ristretto would rub off here. It's now difficult to get a bad coffee in any of the local cafes, but there is a premier league of five or so establishments who take the barrista's art to the fanatical level.

Choosing between them is partly a matter of personal taste, and partly a matter of who's operating the machine at the time you order. However if I had to rank cafes that are, in my opinion, Port Melbourne's best based on coffee alone, I think I'd have to go for:

Secret shakes

Believe it or not, Port Melbourne now has its very own secret, back street, warehouse-style, cafe. It's brought to us by the same crew that have kindly provided a welcome alternative to the virtually ubiquitous Carlton United Brewery pub beverage offerings (and is in fact the rear entrance to their Rose Diner).

Little Rose is tucked away on the one-way stretch of Heath Street, just round the corner from My Sister Says. However officially it's not just a cafe, it's a Jaffle Bar. Aside from the jaffles (which should guarantee an entry in next year's Cheap Eats), they offer some interesting breakfast items, freshly squeezed juices, wacky shakes and the obligatory posh coffee (which, is not yet up to the standard of the sister round the corner).

I really hope that this turns out to be more than just making a few dollars from the ordinarily wasted pub garage, and that other businesses take note to give us Port people a few more surprises away from the obvious offerings of Bay Street.

Priscilla Jones

I've always had a soft spot for the cafe at the Gasworks. It was run by a cheerful, if slightly dizzy, couple and the food was reliable. However service was never their strongest point. Now, it's changed hands and been renamed as Priscilla Jones, yet some things remain remarkably familiar.

Despite the warren of shiny townhouses that now lay out front, this is still a very peaceful spot (well, except when the farmer's market is on that is). If you like Hot Honey in Middle Park, you won't be disappointed, as one of the new partners hails from there. Accordingly the menu is more sophisticated now, and yet manages to add fresh appeal to the needs of both parents and dog owners, and the coffee is now in the same league as Bay Street's best. However it's not just the furniture that is unchanged from the previous incarnation, unfortunately (based on two visits so far), the service still bears that dizzy trademark.

Crème d'oeufs

Crème, with its runny egg colour scheme, seems to have settled into its spot on the corner of Bay and Rouse Streets (4 minute's walk from the bin in front). In many ways this café is the polar opposite of somewhere like My Sister Says; its twin aspect provides space for lots of tables, it has extensive (laminated) menus, and it's frankly ... a bit ordinary. However plenty of people seem happy enough with the combination.

They also open for dinner, which puts them in competition with Shagy's Pizza a couple of doors down. However if their parma is anything to go by, I'd say stick with Shagy - he tends to have better service too.

White rose

In the interests of full disclosure I have to admit a bias here; I am a bit of a fan of the Little Creatures Brewing company. The arrival in Port of a Fitzroy-esque Little Creatures Dining Hall would probably do more to increase my quality of life than if St Ali's, Mamasita and The Espy all decided to move here. Sadly the reborn, and newly white-washed, Rose Diner isn't quite that good, but it does have an exceptional six of their beers and cider on tap (they have a reserve of Carlton tinnies in the fridge for those awkward moments with the uninitiated), and the roller door access to the forthcoming Little Rose jaffle cafe at the back hints at a possible nod in the direction of South Melbourne's hidden coffee mecca.

I think, on balance, that I preferred the previous interior of The Rose; however that proved not to be a winning formula. The new operators obviously liked the horseshoe bar as they've built another one, which seems to jut out even further, perhaps to help separate the diner from the bar. The almost exclusively bare brick walls are offset by patches of pastel green pressed metal, and there's the obligatory strange objects fixed to one wall. So this seems to be a promising addition to the local pub scene. Walking in you can't help thinking "well this isn't very Port Melbourne", which makes you wonder whether the owners have got it horribly wrong, or whether they've taken a cunning look ahead at where the suburb is headed and placed themselves ready to make the most of it. I for one hope it's the latter.

Tiny slice of Manchester

Arriving fashionably late to review a darling of the Melbourne cafe press, here finally we have the Salford Lads Club. It has the warehouse chic, the Google provoking name, the random push bikes and the slightly aloof staff you'd expect from urban coffee junkees ... and it's in Port Melbourne! Well sort of.

It could now be argued that Bridge Street is the place to be for hip cafes, as technically "the club" shares it with both My Sister Says and Balderdash, however tucked as it is behind Bunnings, it's off the map and at least a (brisk) fifteen minute walk away from pretty much anything.

It likely wouldn't still be there if it didn't deliver a top notch espresso, but it's the food that really sets it apart. Although there is a small display cabinet for pides and the like, as its placement in both Cheap Eats and the Good Food Guide atests, the daily lunch specials are where it's at, with interesting restaurant quality dishes at pretty much cafe prices. It's well worth both the trip and inevitable initial akwardness as you first get accustomed to the set up.

Oh and for the record, the Queen is not dead and the original lad's club is approaching its hundredth birthday, and still going strong...
 

Beautiful things

As the tabletops inside attest, the brand new Italian café Bella Cosi on Beach Street is housed in the former Freemasons Tavern, the facade of which was rebuilt in its original 1859 style as part of the apartment block that now pokes out the of the top. This reproduction advertisement on the Stokes Street side, echoes the alcoholic history on the side of the former Joshua Brothers distillery on Pickles Street.

As far as I know, this commercial property (next door to the relatively new Nami Japanese restaurant) has been empty since the 2008 rebuild. It's a wonder to me (especially with The London currently lying dormant) that there aren't more businesses taking advantage of the views down on the front here. They are currently open late Wed-Fri, although currently unlicensed. As well as the pastries, espresso and biscotti that you would expect, the Di Lisio family is also planning on offering coffee machines, cookery classes and gift hampers. Good luck to them :-)

Simple affair

Housed within the bare-brick rear of the old Port Melbourne Theatre building, Simple Affair is Liardet Street's multi-faceted healthy living centre. For a long time the majority of its ground floor space was given over to organic groceries, however recently (perhaps due to the emergence of Brewsters and Thomas Dux) this has dwindled to a couple of shelving units as the cafe has taken centre stage.

However this shift in emphasis has seen the cafe earn itself an entry in the Cheap Eats guide, and at the same time made it easier to be sure of finding a spot to enjoy some good wholesome food.

They have a pretty standard breakfast and lunch menu, but where they excel is in their specials and salads (the bean burrito is a personal favourite). Whilst enjoying their fayre you also have the option to read about the services offered by the wellness centre upstairs.